An ideal life – why not?

//An ideal life – why not?

I have come to realize that struggling to attain a subpar existence is just stupid.

My life has been a mess the past few months.  It needed some shaking up, and I’m glad it’s happened.  Now that the vertigo has decreased, I’m looking around at the landscape of my desires, capabilities, and directions, and I realize I was trying really really hard to be something I don’t want to be.

A salesman.

Now, I’m good at sales.  On some level, I even enjoy it.  But I always have to try to find some way to cram my creative urges into my sales process, which can be an advantage–it makes me stick out, and the salesman that gets attention is the salesman that closes more sales.

Now that I’ve completed my first Video demo reel, I feel legitimate as a creator again.  Why spin my wheels looking for a sales job, when I can do what I really want to be doing?

Since this is an awful time to be looking for a sales job, I’m going to throw in the towel. I give up. My sales resume is going in the recycle bin, and with the help of my new job search BFF, I’m going to redo my resume to showcase my creative talents.

Instead of trying to get around to my passions, I’m going to live my passions first, and then fit in the BS like paperwork and budgets when I can.  Everybody who has ever been successful at living their dream lived it FIRST, and not when it was convenient.

Because you know what?  It’s never convenient.

I had the big breakthrough on this when I was struggling to find time to exercise a few weeks ago.  I need discipline in my life in order to remain focused, and without a regular work schedule, the only way I could do it was to get back into physical training.  (I use P90X during those uber-focused and productive periods of my life when I want to get buff and strong and stop drinking beer every other day.)

Why couldn’t I find the time?  I’m unemployed, fer crissakes!  I can make my schedule any way that I like.  And since I like working out best at 1 in the afternoon, now it is on my calendar to do that.  I put in long blocks of ‘writing time’ and ‘play with my kids’ so my calendar is still festooned with multi-colored tasks, but they are all tasks that I would relish to do if I were living my ideal life.

And when would I like to start living my ideal life, I thought?  How about…today?

By | 2010-11-05T22:14:37+00:00 November 5th, 2010|Introspection|

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